My ex, Rob, was just over. I haven't seen him since probably February or something, which was intentional. I got tired of feeling used by him, him seeing me when it was convenient, things like that. Unfortunately I totally caved when I heard he was in town and he came over for a couple of hours. I guess part of me just wanted to feel something, instead of the stupid numbness and boredom that has encompassed every day for me lately. It didn't go super far, but it was enough to make me feel like I gave him what he wanted and then when he left I questioned whether I had wanted it at all. He just texted saying he didn't expect any of that to happen and he hopes I don't feel like that was intention and he just wanted to see me again. I suppose I will just believe he is telling the truth, and leave it there. I'll see him again sometime in July when he gets back from vacation. He told me he hasn't been with anybody since me even though he said he briefly dated someone down in Champaign where he lives. I wasn't expecting to feel so jealous but hey, it's not like I haven't had my share of dates since we stopped "hanging out." He is moving back to the area in August which wigs me out. I always get my hopes up a little that he will realize what a douche he is and say he wants to be with me again. We'll see. For now I just feel fairly stupid.